Thursday, October 18, 2007

Sky Reconsidered

That night we found
In the green drip
At the bottom of a bottle,
A subtle touch
To sever,
Each drop,
A passing cloud.

You convinced me
That my orange-cream
Sky was no such thing,
That it was diluted red.
At that moment
I could see
The rose petals
Twist through
Frozen space,
Wobble, curtsy, sputter,
Then layer the earth
In their soft
Floral glow.


Honorably Unjustified said...

I enjoy the use of color in the piece, especially in connection with either place, texture, or movement. The mixing of those two very distinct concepts is beautiful.

The only real thing I just seem to have trouble with, and this honestly is mostly likely just me, but something about the first two lines doesn't seem to flow in my reading of it.